http://clampfix.fanworks.net/smut/allquiet.txt </head><body><pre> -- Title: All is Quiet on New Year's Day Author: Sailor Mac Rating: NC-17 Pairing: SubaruXKamui Warnings: Explicit male-male sex, PWP Summary: Kamui is having a difficult time getting through the holidays, and seeks refuge with Subaru. ALL IS QUIET ON NEW YEAR'S DAY An X Sekkushiaru Roman By Sailor Mac The door opened, and a lone figure entered the darkened bedroom, flinging himself down on the bed. He could still hear the noises of laughter and the sounds of music from the parlor below him. He didn't want to hear them. Kamui pulled the pillow over his head. Being dragged to that festival had been torturous enough . . . but when they arrived back at the Imonoyama mansion, they'd been greeted with huge bins and platters of Akira's delicious food and bottle after bottle of champagne, wine, sake. It was a full-blown New Year's Eve party. Kamui wanted no part of it. He'd barely made it through Christmas the week before . . . and Christmas had always been just he and his mother, opening their presents to each other alone in their house. But this . . . there were just too many memories associated with this holiday. New Year's Eve had always been spent . . . with *them*. He couldn't look at any of the colorful booths at the festival tonight without seeing the specters of three little children racing around . . . Kotori always in the lead, Fuuma and Kamui racing to keep up with her. They'd eat their bucket of lucky noodles and watch the fireworks at midnight, and then they'd all head back to the Monous' temple, where they'd camp out on the floor, laughing and talking until finally, they all passed out . . . This *used* to be my favorite holiday, Kamui thought. Even during the years my mother and I were away from Tokyo, I'd always hoped we'd come back here, and I'd get to spend New Year's Eve with Fuuma and Kotori again. He'd tried to get into it tonight. He'd eaten the taiyakis that Sorata bought for everyone . . . they'd just felt like lead in his stomach. He'd dipped for goldfish with Yuzuriha . . .he'd caught nothing, and he didn't care. A loud peal of laughter erupted from downstairs. Sorata, Kamui thought. He's probably dead drunk right now and falling all over Arashi. Karen's probably a couple of sheets to the wind, too. Yuzuriha's eating all the sweet stuff and telling Akira over and over how great it is . . . I just want them all to go away, Kamui thought. I just want this holiday to be gone. A soft tapping at the door made him just hold the pillow over his head more tightly. Somebody's trying to get me to come back down there, he thought. Well, I'm not going. "Kamui?" a very familiar voice said on the other side of the door. "Are you all right?" He sat upright, pulling the pillow away. It was the only person in the world he could stand to see right now. "Come in, Subaru," he said. "It's open." The knob twisted, and the omniyouji entered the room, seeming completely unsurprised to find it pitch-black. "You disappeared suddenly from downstairs," he said, closing the door behind him and sitting on the foot of the bed. "I just wanted to make sure you weren't sick." "No," Kamui said, clutching the bedspread in handfuls. "I'm okay." "You're sure?" "Yes," he said. "I just . . ." "Having a hard time getting through the holidays?" Kamui took a deep breath. Subaru always understood him like nobody else. "Yes." "You miss them." It was a statement, not a question. It didn't need to be a question. And Kamui didn't need to answer it with words. His prolonged silence was all the confirmation Subaru needed. Subaru moved up a little further, toward where Kamui was lying on his back, violet eyes staring off into space, as if seeing the shadows of his lost loved ones somewhere in the darkness of the room. "This is the first time I've observed the holidays at all in almost 10 years," Subaru said. "And if there wasn't people around me . . . I wouldn't have done it this year, either." Kamui sat up a bit. "You haven't since . . . she died?" "Not a single one," Subaru said. "It would just make me feel . . . more alone." "You didn't want to be at that party tonight, either," Kamui said. "No," his friend replied, stretching out next to Kamui. Kamui sighed. "I wanted to run away from that festival, too. Too many memories . . . me and Fuuma and Kotori always went there together, and then . . ." But Subaru didn't hear him. He was looking out into the darkness, lost in his own memory of a New Year's Eve festival, the last time he had ever celebrated the holiday. Hokuto had designed matching yukata for all three of them . . . rather subdued for her, a tasteful red-and-white on black floral print. "You two look like a bridal couple!" she'd teased him and Seishirou-san as they made their way through the festival crowds. "I feel like I should be taking your picture for you to put on the mantelpiece of your first home!" "HOKUTO-CHAN!" Subaru cried, gloved hands covering his face as a deep pink blush spread over his cheeks. "Well, we could have the wedding tonight, if you want," Seishirou-san said cheerfully as he began handing out the little pastries he'd just bought. "I like that idea!" Hokuto said, enthusiastically taking a huge bite of hers. She chewed and swallowed rapidly, as if wanting to get the eating over quickly so she would not lose too much momentum from spelling out her grand plans. "And then . . . you could start your wedding night right at midnight! What could be more romantic than starting the new year with losing your virginity to your sweetheart?" "WE'RE NOT SWEETHEARTS!" Subaru said, pulling his hat down further over his ears as if to block her out and increasing his pace to move away from them, but hearing them still talking and giggling behind him . . . . . . and Hokuto's words echoing in his mind, making him feel something strange . . . something warm . . . Could he *really* be feeling *that*? For Seishirou-san? Could it really be possible that they. . . "Subaru? Subaru?" Kamui's voice hit him like a splash of cold water in the face, jerking him back to the present. He sat up a bit . . . there was no festival, no Hokuto-chan, no Seishirou-san. Just. . .darkness. Within and without. And suddenly, he felt more alone than ever before. "Subaru . . . are you okay?" Kamui asked, his hand on his friend's shoulder. He's so . . . still, he thought. Subaru turned back toward Kamui. "I'm okay. Just. . ." Kamui let his hand rub Subaru's shoulder a bit. "You're about as okay as I am." He could feel his friend tense a bit, and wondered if he'd done the wrong thing. But then, Subaru sighed, relaxed a bit and said, "Yeah." "You miss her, too." "Hokuto loved New Year's Eve," Subaru said. "She'd always want to be the first person at the festival, and the last person to leave it . . . and then, she wanted to stay up until dawn, eating and playing games." "Kotori was like that, too," Kamui said. "She usually outlasted both Fuuma and me. We were both falling asleep . . . she still had the stereo on and was dancing around." He rolled onto his back, a hand draping across his forehead. "Thinking about those days . . . it hurts and feels so good at the same time." "It always does," Subaru said. I should know, he thought. When was the last time I had a memory of her . . . of either of them . . . that didn't hurt like hell? Kamui sat up a bit. "I wonder if it'll still hurt . . .after?" "After the Promised Day, you mean?" Subaru said. "I don't think the pain will ever fully go away . . . but, you'll have closure, and you'll be able to move on." "Do you ever think about what *your* life will be like after then?" Kamui asked, looking up at the patterns of shadows and light cast by trees on the ceiling. "No," Subaru said, quietly. He didn't even expect to be around after the Promised Day. All he wanted to do was destroy Seishirou, avenge his sister . . . and then pass from this life. "Subaru," Kamui said, "you're not planning on dying then, are you?" We know each other far too well, Subaru thought. "Let's just say I'm not exactly planning on a future." "I don't want to hear that!" Kamui cried, sitting bolt upright. "You can't just throw your life away, Subaru! You're worth . . . so much more than that . . .I won't let you die!" Kamui, Subaru thought . . . you deserve so much better than to devote yourself to a broken-down omniyouji, someone whose best days are far, far behind him. Find someone to love, someone who can give fully of himself, or herself, as I can't . . . "Kamui," he said, quietly, "I have to do what I have to do." "Subaru . . ." He suddenly flung himself back down and embraced his friend, anger welling up inside him toward the Sakurazukamori. He's the one who did this, he thought. He's the one who made Subaru feel that the only thing he has to live for is his revenge. He wished he had the jerk in front of him at that moment . . . he'd blast him to kingdom come, and then some. . . You stole his soul, you bastard, Kamui thought. And I'm stealing it back. Subaru hugged him back, gently stroking Kamui's hair. "Don't worry about me," he whispered. "You do what *you* have to do. You want to try to bring Fuuma back, don't you? Isn't that your wish?" I thought it was, that I wanted nothing else more in the world, Kamui thought. But now . . . I wonder what my *real* true wish is . . . whether it's got something to do with you. . . "I want to make my wish come true, but . . ." He reached up and let his fingers gently trail over Subaru's close-cropped hair. "I want to help *you* make your wishes come true, too." Subaru looked away, a faraway expression in his eyes. He's lost somewhere in his past, Kamui thought. Somewhere . . . with *him*. "I'll be able to handle that on my own," the omniyouji said in a voice barely above a whisper. "I don't know if I. . .." Kamui stopped abruptly. The words he wanted to say at the end of that sentence were ". . .want to go on without you." He froze, a whirlpool of thoughts and emotions churning away inside him. Has he come to mean *that* much to me? he thought. But he knew very well what the answer to that was. The concept was frightening . . . and at the same time, indescribably delicious. He pulled away from Subaru a bit. The omniyouji noticed the tension, the withdrawal. "Kamui?" he said. "Are you all right?" "I . . .I . . ." He didn't know what to say. The words were getting stuck in his throat, choking him. "Are you thinking about the Promised Day?" Subaru said, gently. "Having to confront Fuuma?" "No . . . well, sort of . . . it's . . . I can't stand the thought of you dying!" he cried. He struggled to hold the tears back, but they came anyway, small sobs escaping from him. Subaru hugged him closely, and Kamui buried his head in his chest, letting his tears flow onto the front of his friend's yukata. "Sssshhh," the older man whispered. "I told you not to worry about me. No matter what happens on the Promised Day . . . or even before . . . I'll always be with you. One way or the other." Kamui felt like a child crying on his mother's breast again . . . but having Subaru hold him was very, very different. He could breathe in his scent, a mixture of cigarette smoke and a spicy incense, feel his heart beating. . . It was comforting. And it also stirred other emotions which were dark and hot and sweet . . . This startled him again, but he didn't pull away from Subaru. He didn't want to leave the circle of his friend's arms now for anything. Gradually, his tears subsided, and he lay with his head nestled on Subaru's chest, those strange, hot emotions bubbling within him again. "Subaru?" Kamui said, not raising his head. "Yes?" Subaru replied, stroking his hair again. "I'm so glad I met you," Kamui said, quietly. "I'm glad I met you, too," Subaru replied, his fingers still stroking the boy's silken hair. It feels so nice to have him here like this, he thought. So nice, so natural . . . different than anything I ever experienced with Seishirou-san. That was like being doused in liquid fire, this . . . is like drinking hot chocolate. Sweet, and delicious, and warming you up from the inside . . . It mystified him that he was feeling something like this. He didn't think he was capable anymore. But here it was, pulsing through his entire body like sunshine in his bloodstream . . . gentle, tender emotions, as well as . . . desire? Could he be feeling *that* for the boy in his arms? He found the idea confusing, and frightening . . . and also, strangely welcome. Kamui lifted his head, inched up a bit and brought his lips to Subaru's face, planting a soft kiss on his cheek. He pulled back a bit . . . should I have done that? he thought . But Subaru just gave him one of his sweet little smiles and raised his head, returning the kiss, and giving Kamui another near his hairline. The younger boy made a small purring noise, and aimed to give Subaru another kiss on the cheek . . . Their lips connected instead. For a moment, both young men panicked. Each had an impulse to break away from the other, to say "I'm sorry" . . . But it was an impulse neither acted on. And slowly, the kiss deepened, their arms wrapping tightly around each other as they shyly moved their mouths against one another, tentatively exploring, as if afraid to make the wrong move. . . then, they grew bolder, their mouths pressing harder together, their bodies following suit, starting to rub together, creating friction. . . Kamui flicked his tongue a bit against the place where their mouths were joined, and Subaru felt it, a hot shudder passing through his whole body. His own mouth opened with a gasp. Their tongues came together in a burst of wet heat, moving, seeking, finding. Kamui pressed his body against the omniyouji's, moving back and forth, the garments that separated them feeling like brick walls. His brain was burning with hot fantasies . . . Subaru's naked flesh against his, their erections rubbing against each other . . . because he was very, very aware now of the hardness in his own pants, and the answering one on his friend's body. He made a low, throaty groan of need deep in his throat as his fingers tangled in Subaru's hair, wanting to pull him closer, closer still, until they fused and became one being. Subaru eased his lips from Kamui's, kissing his cheek, temple, ear. . . Kamui let out another moan at the feel of his new lover's breath scorching him, his tongue tracing the lobe, then moving up to tease the tiny hole. When he felt the older man's hands tugging his yukata upward, he didn't protest . . . in fact, he eased away from Subaru, arms held up over his head, encouraging the other to pull the garment up and off. The unwanted piece of clothing landed on the floor, and Subaru sat up so Kamui could do the same to him. "Subaru," Kamui whispered, his hands starting to explore the delicately muscled chest, the broad shoulders. "You're so, so beautiful. . ." "So are you," Subaru replied, bringing his lips to Kamui's again as a hand slid over his shoulder, down his chest, lower, lower . . . Kamui jumped and let out a gasp as Subaru's fingers found a nipple, brushing across the surface . . . then gently, slowly, circling across the pink part, avoiding the peak itself. "You like that?" Subaru asked. "Y-yes!" Kamui gasped, tilting his head back, his eyes closing as Subaru began to rub the thumbs of both hands back and forth, back and forth across the tan-pink little peaks. Oh, it was so delicious, the tingles of electric heat that ran between his chest and that throbbing, aching place between his legs. His own hands reached for Subaru's chest again, running up and down, feeling, feeling. . . When he encountered the hard little knots, he began to rub them gently as Subaru had done to him. He felt them stiffen, growing bigger, and it sent another thrill of excitement through him. Subaru let out a moan, just like Kamui had. Encouraged, Kamui took the nipples between his thumb and forefinger and gently squeezed, and Subaru let out a hoarse cry, then gasped. "How does that feel?" Kamui whispered. "I'll show you," Subaru replied, bringing his lips to Kamui's again, their mouths opening almost instantly as Kamui felt his fingers brush his peaks again . . . And then, there was a sharp, wild sensation, right on the border between pleasure and pain, and Kamui would have cried out if Subaru's mouth wasn't feasting on his, tongue teasing his lips before plunging in hungrily. Kamui squeezed Subaru's nipples again in response, and felt his lover try something different, brushing his fingers back and forth over the buds rapidly, then a brief squeeze, then rubbing his thumbs over them again . . . Kamui leaned back, trying to give his lover more and more access . . . and found himself tumbling backwards. Subaru eased him down to the bed, kissing his neck, letting his tongue flicker here and there. "Gods," Kamui moaned. "So good . . . don't stop. . ." "I won't," Subaru whispered, kissing down Kamui's pulse line, stopping here and there to swirl his tongue, tasting something clean and herbal. Kamui gasped, arching upward, as Subaru moved down over his shoulders, and to his chest. . . When his tongue brushed a nipple already made hyper-sensitive from their finger play, Kamui let out a loud cry, and when his lips encircled it and he started to suck, the younger boy nearly screamed. He tangled his fingers in his hair again, holding him down, never wanting to let him go . . . Each hot, wet tug of the omniyouji's mouth sent a fresh wave of sensation through Kamui, and he writhed, thinking that he was never going to contain all this, that he was going to explode for sure. "Please!" Kamui gasped. "Oh, please!" Subaru raised his head. "What is it you want?" "I . . . don't know, I just want. . ." He wanted completion, fulfillment . . . but he didn't know how to ask for it. He writhed mindlessly, feeling like his skin was aflame. Subaru kissed his face, gently. "I think I know what it is. Just relax. . ." Kamui felt his lover move down the bed. . . and then, his underwear was jerked down and off. The younger boy gasped at the feel of cool air hitting heated flesh. There was the sound of another garment being stripped off, and Kamui knew Subaru was ridding himself of his own last scrap of clothing. And suddenly, there were fingers stroking up and down his manhood, slowly, deliberately. . . The boy let out another cry as more and more pulses of heat flooded him. It was agony, torture . . . and more luscious than anything in his wildest imaginings. Subaru kept stroking him, running his fingers along the shaft, then around the head, then back down again. . . he leaned over and brushed his tongue over the tip, lightly, tentatively . . . . When Kamui let out a hoarse cry, Subaru began to ease it into his mouth . . .slowly, slowly, he had to be careful, he'd choked more than once when he'd done this to Seishirou-san. How different this was than that . . . he felt like he was *giving* to his lover, unselfishly and of his own free will. . . instead of *serving* him. As the hot, wet sensation of Subaru's mouth encasing him, starting to suck on him, exploded in his mind, Kamui thrust his hips upward, gasping, moaning, his head tossing wildly from side to side as his hands clutched at the sheets. There was no thought, there was only feeling, wild and honeyed and delicious, growing stronger and deeper as Subaru slid Kamui in, out, in . . . faster, harder, deeper, driving the younger boy more and more and more mad. . . Subaru slid Kamui's hardened length out of his mouth, ran his tongue up and down it slowly and deliberately, then began to kiss along the shaft. As he felt his young lover's body shudder in delight, a hot thrill ran through his own blood, and he took the erection back within his lips, as deep as he possibly could. Kamui writhed beneath him, suspended between life and death, between reality and fantasy, and everything was still, absolutely still . . . And then, everything crashed into frantic motion, and Kamui shrieked as the hot spasms began to wrack him in all-consuming waves. "Su . . . SUBARU!" he cried, lifting his hips off the bed again and again and again, thinking yes, yes, it's over, and then being flooded with more and more delicious tremors. He felt like his very life force was draining from him . . and he didn't care. Kamui collapsed to the bed, letting out small sounds that were almost like cooing. Subaru kissed him, sweetly. "How was that?" he whispered. The younger boy's eyelashes fluttered open. "I . . . oh, gods, it was so incredible . . . thank you. . ." "You don't have to thank me," Subaru said, snuggling against him. "I wanted that." Kamui held him closely . . . and noticed there was still a hard bulge pressing against the omniyouji's lower stomach. He needs to be satisfied, the younger boy thought, just like he satisfied me. His fingers began training down over Subaru's chest, belly, going lower, lower . . . When he encountered the erection, he took it his his hand, marveling at how it felt so much like his own, yet so different at the same time. The shape wasn't quite the same, it was a bit broader in the base . . . Subaru kissed his face. "You don't have to," he said. "I *want* to," Kamui replied. And he began to stroke Subaru with a rapid up-and-down motion, stopping to flutter his fingers over the head, then beginning the whole-hand stroke again. They rolled over together so that Subaru was on his back, Kamui on top. The younger boy brought his lips to his lover's for a fierce kiss, slowly letting his tongue slide in and out, then nibbling on his lower lip. . .then bringing their mouths together again. . . His fingers grew bolder, moving up to the head, where he traced slow, lazy patterns around the opening in the top. When Subaru made a noise that was something like a growl, he began to rub his whole palm back and forth, rapidly, and stroked his tongue down his neck, hot and wet. He nibbled at his lover's collarbone before kissing down his chest rapidly . . . Subaru writhed helplessly under the onslaught of his young lover's hands and mouth . . . gods, how did someone as innocent as him know just what to do like that? "Kamui," he gasped, and then cried out his name again, louder, as the boy's tongue began to ravish a nipple, stroking, swirling . . . he lowered his head and kissed the erect peak over and over, then took it in his lips and sucked, hard, as his hand began its rapid pumping motion again. "Ka . . .Kamui," Subaru gasped, lost in passion, his entire world shrunk down to two pinpoints of ecstasy, marked by the boy's fingers and mouth. He was even bringing his other hand into play now, gently caressing the sac beneath his manhood as his mouth switched to the other nipple and began to assault it. Kamui was murmuring something to Subaru between kisses and licks, but he was too far gone to make out the words, all he could think of was one thing, getting there, getting there. . . Then, Kamui's mouth started to suck and his fingers started to rub twice as fast, and the release came, shooting through him like a lighting bolt, and he jerked and cried out his lover's name, throwing his head back, body arching upward again and again as one wave of fire after another broke within him. Kamui quickly reached for the tissue box beside the bed and got Subaru cleaned off, then snuggled next to his lover, softly kissing his cheek. "Was that okay?" he said. Subaru hugged him closely. "Okay? That was . . . gods, that was *incredible.*" The climax had left him sleepy, dazed . . . but feeling good. *Very* good. Better than he'd felt in a long, long time. "Good," Kamui replied, kissing him again. With a soft sigh, they nestled into each other's arms, Kamui's head on Subaru's chest. "It finally got quiet down there," Kamui remarked. "They've all passed out, I'm sure," Subaru replied. "Exhaustion or alcohol. Or both." "There's going to be some sick people tomorrow," Kamui said. "We're probably going to have to talk very quietly." And the ones who aren't hung over, he thought, will probably be asking where we were. We'll just tell them we went to bed. Well, it is the truth, isn't it? They just don't have to know that we went to bed *together*. "I want to get some sleep now myself," Subaru said, yawning. "Stay with me?" Kamui said. "I'm not going anywhere," Subaru replied, giving him one last soft kiss before drifting off. Kamui stayed for a few moments more, looking at his sleeping lover . . . how very, very beautiful he was. I just want to keep you with me forever, he thought. I'll find a way to save you . . . I won't let you destroy yourself going after your revenge. He kissed the sleeping omniyouji and whispered, "I love you." Snuggling next to Subaru and drifting off to sleep himself, Kamui thought, and maybe. . .someday . . . I can hear you say those words back to me. * * * As the sunlight hit his eyes, Subaru awoke, conscious of two things that were very different. First, there was a very warm body snuggled against him, head on his chest, an arm thrown across him. Second . . . he had *slept*. Through the entire night. How long had it been since that had happened? Surely not since Hokuto died. He looked down at the boy lying against him. Kamui had a little smile on his face, as if he were dreaming something pleasant. Good, Subaru thought . . . he knew how often his friend had nightmares about Fuuma's betrayal and Kotori's death. It was a strange feeling, but oh, so delicious, this skin-on-skin contact. He'd avoided any kind of closeness with other human beings for so long that he'd completely forgotten what it was like. And there was only one other person he'd ever been this intimate with. He lowered his head so he could brush his cheek against Kamui's thick hair. Everything about him . . . it's so, so very different from anything I experienced with Seishirou-san, he thought. I don't feel . . . overwhelmed. Subaru hugged Kamui tighter. The urge for a cigarette was screaming through his blood, but he ignored it. His craving for this boy's warmth far outweighed his craving for nicotine. He wondered if he should have let things go as far as they did the night before, if it would have been better for both of them if he'd put the brakes on as soon as Kamui's kisses got too deep. He couldn't imagine that a commitment to him could be good for the boy. But . . . it felt so *good*, and *right*. And oh, how they both needed that at this time in their lives. He stroked Kamui's hair and face, thinking that last night was the first time he had felt fully *human* in what seemed like an eternity. * * * Kamui opened his eyes when he felt the gentle stroking. I'm still dreaming, he thought. And it feels so *real* . . . He lifted his head . . . to find himself looking into a pair of green eyes. "S . . . Subaru?" he whispered. "Good morning," the omniyouji replied. "Sleep well?" Kamui sat up. "You're really here? I didn't . . . dream it?" "No, it's real. How are you feeling this morning?" It's not a dream, Kamui thought. Subaru and I really did make love last night. Well, I don't know if you'd actually call it *making love*, because there was no penetration, but . . . gods, it was so beautiful . . . "Well . . . I feel . . ." He looked down. "What is it?" Subaru said, beginning to lightly stroke his hair again. "Right now, I feel . . . like I really have to go to the men's room." Subaru let out a small laugh at that (how long since he had spontaneously *laughed*?) There was something so *human* about that which was somehow charming. "You go," he told the boy. "I'll be here." Kamui dashed off to the bathroom. He wasn't entirely lying, but . . . he needed a couple of moments alone, to collect his thoughts. As he was washing his hands, he caught a glimpse of his own face in the mirror. He was a bit startled by the expression of his eyes. I don't look *sad* anymore, he thought. Well, I don't feel sad. I still feel warm inside, like I did when he was touching me. He hugged himself, leaning against the wall, remembering the sensation of Subaru's hands and mouth on his body. A slow heat started to steal through him again. Gods, he thought, I want him over . . . and over . . . and over. I must be some kind of pervert. Kamui went back into the bedroom to find Subaru lying on his side, gazing out the window thoughtfully. He sat back on the bed, leaned over and kissed his friend on the cheek. "Happy New Year," he said. Subaru sat up beside him. "That's right . . . it's New Year's Day, isn't it?" He put an arm around Kamui. "We're probably the only two people awake." "That's okay," Kamui said, leaning his head on the omniyouji's shoulder. "I don't care if none of them are awake. I don't want to go downstairs. I'd rather just stay here with you for awhile." Subaru rested his head against the younger boy's. I don't blame you for wanting to hold onto this moment, Kamui, he thought. I know better than anyone . . . happiness can explode in your face at any second. There was silence for a long moment, as they just rested against one another, enjoying each other's heat, each other's scent. Kamui felt like time had stopped, and if he had anything to say about it, it wouldn't start up again. Then, Subaru said, "We *are* going to have to put in an appearance downstairs eventually." "I know," Kamui sighed. "I guess I'm going to have to take a shower, get dressed . . ." And then, before he could think better of it, he heard himself saying, "You could take a shower *with* me, if you want." Subaru was taken aback for a second. That seemed so . . . forward . . . but the idea seemed appealing. And he felt a bit embarrassed at getting excited about it so quickly. Kamui raised his head, smiling. "You're blushing." "I . . . I am?" said Subaru, blushing even more. Kamui leaned back, a playful expression crossing his face. "Does that mean you don't want to take a shower with me?" "I . . . no, I mean yes, I mean . . . I do want to." Subaru could feel his cheeks practically aflame now. This boy had reduced him to an awkward teenager again . . . and, strangely, he didn't mind it at all. Kamui hopped off the bed, holding his hand out to the older man. "Well, then?" Subaru stood up and let Kamui lead him by the hand into the bathroom, grateful that Kamui's suite had its own bathroom. He could just imagine the others walking in on them. The room itself sported a large, almost hot tub-sized bathtub, glossy black tile and a wall of floor-to-ceiling mirrors. Kamui busied himself turning on the taps and adjusting the temperature, then turned to Subaru, throwing his arms around him. "Ready when you are," the younger boy said. "Oh, I'm very ready," Subaru replied, looking at the reflection of them embracing in the mirror. They looked so . . . *right* together, Kamui's slight form fitting perfectly into the embrace of the taller, more broad-shouldered man. They stepped under the spray, and Kamui drew the curtain shut, picking up a tube of shower gel from the top of the tub, squeezing some into his hand and giving it to Subaru. The omniyouji took it and started to wash down rapidly . . . but his gaze was drawn to where Kamui was running his lathered hands up and down his own torso, a blissful expression on his face. He held an arm out, sliding his fingers along it, slowly, slowly . . . then began to rub his own shoulder in small circles. The hand moved down over the boy's chest, back and forth, back and forth . . . It was totally innocent, but it looked like he was caressing himself. And it was maddeningly sexy. The flash of a fantasy entered Subaru's head, of himself walking into Kamui's bedroom to find the boy naked, on his bed, one hand on his chest, gently pinching and stroking his own nipples . . . the other, lower, caressing his manhood, pumping it in rapid strokes. He imagined Kamui moaning, writhing . . . and whispering "Subaru. . ." He had to turn away, knowing that he had a full, rock-hard erection now. Grabbing the tube, he began to scrub himself vigorously, not stopping until he was thoroughly washed . . . but unable to shake the mental picture of Kamui, skin flushed and sweaty, hands sliding over his most sensitive flesh as he moaned in sensual abandon. . . What's happening to me? he thought. I have much better control over myself than this! I have to, in order to work magic . . . why am I so . . . undone around him? Kamui noticed that Subaru had turned away from him, and was trembling. Maybe he's not comfortable with this, he thought. Maybe I shouldn't have asked him. A small amount of guilt began to steal through the boy. He grabbed a bottle of shampoo and began to rapidly scrub his hair. Oh, gods, Kamui thought, I've probably brought back memories of . . . *him*. He scrubbed at his hair more vigorously, as if to wash the very idea of the Sakurazukamori touching Subaru out of his head entirely. I'll apologize to Subaru afterward, he thought. I just thought . . . after last night . . . He handed the bottle over to Subaru. The older man didn't notice at first. Kamui tapped him on the shoulder, and finally, Subaru turned a bit. . . . . . and Kamui got a glimpse of his arousal. Kamui smiled to himself . . . and felt an enormous surge of relief. So that's what he's hiding, he thought. He didn't want me to see how excited he is. Maybe he thought it would scare or intimidate me. Subaru. . . you don't need to feel like that. I want you as much as you want me. As Subaru lathered his hair, Kamui threw his arms around him, embracing him from behind, pressing his body against the older man's. Subaru could feel the young chest against his back, thighs pressed against his legs. . . and the erection that answered his own rubbing, rubbing his buttocks. Subaru leaned back, wanting more, more contact, starting to shift his body slightly, so his own slick flesh moved against Kamui's . . . touch, friction, soft and slick, causing warm sensations to pulse through both of them . . . Kamui felt the brushing against his nipples, thighs, manhood, and he let out a small moan. The younger boy reached up so he could guide Subaru's head back under the spray, never losing the body contact as he helped rinse him off, running his fingers through the close-cropped strands. . . and then, the hands began to slide lower, fingertips brushing his cheeks, slipping over his neck, playing over his collarbone. . . Kamui placed his palms flat on Subaru's chest and moved them downward, rubbing small circles over the wet skin as he nipped at the flesh of his lover's back. His fingers were searching, searching. . . Subaru shuddered deeply as Kamui's fingers found his nipples. He leaned back, moaning, as they flicked back and forth over the hardened buds, wet and fast. . . then squeezed gently . . . then rubbed hard with thumbs . . . . "K. . . Kamui . . ." Subaru gasped. "Oh . . . *gods*. . ." "You feel so good," Kamui whispered. "So, so good. . ." He took his hands away, and Subaru made a small sound of disappointment . . . But, Kamui said, "Turn around. Let me kiss you." Subaru obeyed, and instantly, they were in each other's arms, pressing their bodies together hard as their mouths eagerly sought each other, then came together with hunger, lips opening almost instantly to allow tongues to clash and rub and caress. Their hands slid up and down backs, shoulders, along arms, up to the back again. . . Kamui reached down and grasped Subaru's bottom in both hands, squeezing firmly, making the older man let out a cry. . . and copy the action, grabbing Kamui's buttocks and caressing, massaging. . . They squeezed hard together, then released, squeezed, released, pulses of heat running through their bodies. Subaru felt Kamui's mouth leave his and start to nip at his lips, then chin. He tipped his head back, and Kamui started to move down his neck, tracing patterns on his skin with his tongue. No, not just patterns . . . Subaru suddenly realized it was *writing*. And then, he realized what the kanji spelled out -- I - WANT -YOU. He thought he would faint, or explode, or both. "Gods," Subaru gasped. "Kamui . . . that's . . ." He was suddenly inspired to be more aggressive, to not let the boy take the lead all the time. He pushed Kamui firmly against the shower wall, his mouth claiming the younger one's with fierce immediacy, hands sliding over his chest, searching for his nipples as Kamui had done to him. When he found them, he caressed them gently, then began to slide downward, kissing over Kamui's neck, down to his chest . . . He began to lap at the left nipple eagerly, savoring how it felt under his tongue, the texture, the way it hardened as he pleasured it. He could hear Kamui's ragged breathing as he took it in his lips and started to suck, slowly at first, then faster, harder. He pulled his head away, then licked at it again, teasing it gently with his teeth before suckling once more. Kamui's fingers were tangling in his hair as the boy whimpered in pleasure . . . made a small noise of disappointment as Subaru raised his head . . . then cried out anew as he began to feast on the other nipple . . . lick, suck, nip, lick, suck. . . . Subaru pulled gently on Kamui, drawing the boy to his knees beside him. He brushed the boy's unruly, wet hair out of his eyes and kissed him tenderly. "Kamui," he said, softly, "I want to pleasure you with my mouth . . . while you do the same thing to me." Kamui looked down. "I've never done that before . . . " "It's all right. If you don't want to do that. . ." The younger boy looked back up, rapidly. "No, no, I want to do it. It's just, well . . . I don't know how to start. . ." "Just do whatever you feel like," Subaru whispered gently, stroking his face. "You'll be fine." "Okay. . . how do we do this?" "I'm going to lie flat on my back. You lie on top of me with your head where you can get at me comfortably, and then straddle my head." Kamui got into position as Subaru instructed. He looked at the erection before him and wondered if he'd be able to pleasure Subaru orally as well as his lover had done to him last night . . . but then decided it was probably not worth putting excess pressure on himself. He was just going to relax, have fun . . . He began to slowly lick along Subaru's length, running his tongue from the base to the tip, then back down again. A groan from his lover told him he was doing well. He repeated the action again, lingering on the head a little, swirling his tongue along the opening. Then, he took a deep breath, opened wide, and slid Subaru in, slowly, slowly, bit by bit. . . the sensation was odd, but definitely not unpleasant. He began to suck, carefully, and moved his head back, back, until it was almost all the way out . . . then back in again. . . And then, he felt Subaru's mouth starting to work on him, laying kisses over the head, then licking up and down his length . . . Kamui made a small noise of pleasure in his throat, and began to suck on Subaru faster, taking him a little deeper on the next instroke. Oh, gods, he's a natural, Subaru thought, sliding Kamui into his own mouth and starting to suck. So, so good . . . he's doing this as if he were born doing it. . . . Kamui picked up the pace, and Subaru matched him, hot sensations running through his blood. . .he resisted the urge to buck his hips, not wanting to choke or frighten the boy. Kamui couldn't believe how heavenly this was. Subaru felt wonderful, tasted delicious . . . and then there was the sensations in Kamui's own body from Subaru's mouth, hot and wild and sweet and feeling ready to explode at any moment . . . Subaru moved Kamui in and out faster, letting his fingers tease and stroke the sac beneath, coaxing the boy toward a moment of absolute bliss . . . he could feel the tension in his lover's muscles, could feel he was almost there, almost there. . . And suddenly, everything exploded in white light for Kamui, and he was wracked by one spasm of ecstasy after another . . . just when it seemed it was over, there was more and more and more pleasure . . . Throughout it all, he didn't let Subaru slip away, and he kept sucking, wanting to bring his lover over the edge with him. Finally, he was rewarded, and Subaru let out a cry as he shuddered in bliss, flames pulsing through him over and over again until they gave way to a steady, fuzzy warmth. Kamui's mouth was flooded with his lover's essence, and he almost choked . . . it was so . . .odd . . . He quickly turned his head and spit it out onto the shower floor, hoping Subaru didn't notice. Swallowing was something he'd have to practice in the future. They turned so they could kiss, softly, tasting themselves on each other's mouths, which Kamui found extraordinarily thrilling. "That was incredible," Kamui said. "Even more so than last night." "It was," Subaru replied, holding Kamui close. "You learn fast." "Do I?" Kamui blushed a bit. "Incredibly." Subaru kissed him, holding him closer. Gods, he thought, if only this could go on forever . . . if only we didn't have to go downstairs and face the others . . . if only I never had to face Seishirou-san again, and have to taste the bitterness of everything I have lost . . . The water was starting to run cold. It was time to go. Subaru gave Kamui one last kiss and stood up, turning off the taps. He helped his lover to his feet . . . Kamui was still a bit wobbly and fuzzy. "I don't want this to be over," Kamui sighed as they began to towel each other off, echoing Subaru's earlier thoughts. Subaru kissed the top of his head. "There'll be other nights," he said, surprising even himself -- but, at the same time, he knew he meant it. Kamui didn't say anything else -- he didn't have to. He just held Subaru, tightly, and Subaru hugged back. Finally, they dressed, Subaru pulling the previous night's yukata back on until he could get back to his room and dress. "I hope the others won't be able to tell . . . you know," Kamui said. "Just act normally, and they won't," Subaru replied as they stepped into the hall. Across the hall, another door opened at the same time, and another. Karen and Aoki came out of one door together. Arashi and Sorata came out of the other. There was one brief second when all six Dragons of Heaven just stared at each other, mouths open, words failing them . . . Then, Karen gave everyone a sly smile, tossed her hair back, and said, "Well. Happy New Year, everyone." Aoki turned redder than a beet and scurried back into the room. Sorata followed suit, dragging Arashi behind him before slamming the door. Subaru and Kamui ducked back into Kamui's room, closing the door behind them and breaking out in laughter. Oh, how *good* it felt for Subaru to laugh . . . to him, it was as satisfying a release as the orgasm he'd had earlier. "And we were worried . . ." Kamui laughed. "Looks like we weren't the only ones who had fun last night!" Subaru just continued to laugh. He could just imagine the red faces and awkward moments at brunch later on . . . and poor little Yuzuriha trying to figure out what was wrong with everyone . . . He grabbed Kamui in his arms and hugged him. "Thank you . . . for the best holiday of my life." Kamui hugged back. I love you, Subaru, he thought. I love you so much . . . and someday, soon, I'm going to tell you that. "Happy New Year," he told his lover, before bringing their lips together in a sweet, warm kiss. AUTHOR'S NOTES: This story was originally done as a (somewhat belated) holiday gift for the members of the Subaru_Kamui ML. It's my first attempt at doing something with X. (I do hope to be doing X stories with actual *plots* in the future. ~_^) X is the property of CLAMP. These characters ain't mine, I'm just borrowing them for a little while.</pre><p><a href="./">Back</a></p><p><a href=http://www.dreamhost.com/donate.cgi?id=216><img border=0 alt="Donate towards our web hosting bill!" src=https://secure.newdream.net/donate1.gif></a></p></body></html>